Iglance at Arabella as she’s bent over her makeshift desk in our tent, writing so furiously that I can see specks of ink on her cheeks from where I’m standing. Her eyes shimmer with contentment as she pens a letter to her sister, and I wonder if I’ll ever be able to make her smile the way she does tonight.I’ve made her laugh, and there have been moments where I brought her happiness, but it’s always been fleeting. Could I ever make her as happy as a letter from her sister does? Arabella sighs, her smile dropping for a mere moment before she shakes her head and continues to write. I wonder what thought just crossed her mind.I’ve never before felt curious about a woman, but I wish to know every single thing that consumes her. I want to know her every stray thought, every reason behind her sighs. I suppose it’s only fitting that setting my people free means losing her. I’ve been cursed from the moment I was born, and I’ll die feeling its effects. It is fortunate that I’ll be surrounded by memories of Arabella in the end. I’m fortunate to have had her for as long as I may.Arabella looks up, her hand rising to her chest as her eyes widen. “Felix,” she whispers. “I didn’t see you standing there. How long have you been there?”Far longer than I’ll admit to. “Not long,” I tell her. She stares at me, almost as though she’s trying to read me, but then she shakes her head, the movement so subtle I almost miss it.“I know I’m asking a lot of you, but would you be willing to send this letter to Serena? I promised her I’d stay in touch even while we’re on the road. She’s worried. I hate the thought of her sitting there filled with anxiety. I just know she’ll struggle to sleep until she hears from me. No matter what I tell her, she’s certain I’ll freeze to death or—” She stops speaking abruptly, her cheeks rapidly turning rosy.“Or what?”Arabella looks away and shakes her head. “It’s nothing. She fears you, and she’s convinced you’ll harm me someday. No matter what I say, she can’t be dissuaded. I suppose it has something to do with the way you handled Father on our wedding day. That’s all she’s ever seen of you.”“What do you think?” I ask, hesitating. “Do you think I’ll hurt you, Arabella? Do you fear me?”She looks up at me, wide-eyed. “You have never hurt me, Felix.”That’s not an answer, and she knows it. I suppose I should be grateful that she isn’t lying to me outright. I wish I could set her at ease and swear to her that no harm will ever come to her, but the longer we’re away from the palace, the more restless I feel. With every day that passes, I can feel my control slip away. I feel the darkness pull at me, luring me with thoughts I can’t keep at bay. From experience, I know I’ll only be able to resist for so long, but I expected to last far longer than I have.It’s almost as though the curse is sentient and aware we’re close to defeating it. Its pull is stronger than ever before.“Felix? Will you send the letter for me?”I nod and walk up to her, taking the letter from her carefully, and all the while resisting the urge to touch her. My need for her grows every second, but I fear being with her when I have so very little control.“Of course, beloved.” I stare at the letter as I focus on the memory of the long table in Althea’s throne room, where I’ve been sending all of Arabella’s letters. The letter shimmers bright gold before disappearing, and Arabella smiles.“Thank you, Felix.”I nod and turn to leave, but Arabella grabs my hand and stops me in place.“Where are you going?” Her voice is soft, sweet, and entirely irresistible.“I need to check on the progress of the pipes. The soldiers are still digging, and I’m wondering if perhaps it would be better to utilize alchemy again after all. This is the third town that hasn’t had the pipes in place for our arrival. It’s slowing us down considerably.”Arabella nods in understanding, but there’s a hint of a smile on her lips. “Or you could just leave them to do their job, and we can enjoy our evening together. We haven’t taken an evening off yet. Aren’t you tired?”I hear the unspoken words, the longing. She misses me as much as I miss her, but I cannot push aside my fears. “I’ll just go check up on them. I won’t be long.”“Felix,” she says, my name a plea on her lips. She rises from her seat and lets her hands slide up my chest, until she’s got them wrapped around my shoulders.She looks into my eyes, her gaze searching, though I can’t tell what for. She hesitates, and then she rises to her tiptoes, her lips finding mine.I groan when she kisses me and thread my hand through her hair, pulling her closer to me with a desperation I struggle to contain.She moans against my lips and I lower my hands to her waist, lifting her up higher, until she wraps her legs around me.I push her against the wall, rolling my hips against her the way I’ve been dreaming of. Her moans fuel my desire, and I’m tempted to take her right here and now. I feel my control slip for a single moment, my vision going black as the shadows pull at me, taking away my consciousness. It takes all of me to fight it, to remain right here with Arabella.I pull away from her and drop my forehead against hers, both of us breathing hard. She’s entirely unaware of my internal torment, and though I wish to keep her in denial, it isn’t safe.“Arabella,” I murmur, my eyes falling closed. “I can feel it. I feel the curse’s allure, and it’s hard to resist. It pulls at me, tempting me to give in to the darkness. I’m not as strong as I wish I were, beloved. While you might win this fight against the curse, I might lose it. And if I do… I can’t tell you what the consequences would be, but I can tell you I have never opened my eyes after one of those blackouts without being surrounded by casualties. I can’t risk you being one of them.”She places her palms flat against my chest and shakes her head. “You won’t hurt me, Felix. You won’t.”I cup her cheek and force a smile onto my face, in awe of the trust I see in her eyes. It’s that same trust that’ll make it hurt so much more. “You don’t know that, my love. I’m just going to check on the soldiers, all right? I just need some fresh air.”She looks at me as though she wants me to stay, and there’s nothing more I’d rather do… but I can’t. Not tonight. Not when the curse’s allure is so strong.Arabella’s expression haunts me all the way into the woods, and with every step I take, I resist the urge to go back to her, to fulfill the needs she left unspoken.My hands tremble as I take a shard of the Mirror of Pythia out of my pocket, holding it up in the moonlight. “Pythia,” I whisper. “Show me the future.”Her face appears in the mirror, and she nods before her image is replaced by the same flashes of the future I’ve become accustomed to, the very same ones I’ve come to despise. I watch as Arabella rides away on Sirocco, my palace fading into the background the farther she gets away. I see her embrace her sister, and I watch her sitting down on her father’s throne, a crown on her head. The image shifts to the one that pains me most, and the darkness calls to me as I watch her rest her head on Nathaniel’s shoulder, his arms wrapped around her intimately.“These are all visions I’ve seen before. Has any part of our future changed?”Pythia appears in front of me again, her face serene. “Perhaps it is not a change, but a new image came to me. I don’t believe it to be wise for you to see it.”noveldramaMy heart twists painfully as the images shift, until I’m looking at myself, infected by the curse. My eyes are fully black, black tendrils of smoke surrounding both me and Arabella beside me. The images are moving so quickly I can barely make sense of them, but the one thing I see clearly is the cuts on Arabella’s skin and the blood that flows from her wounds. The images fade away, until it’s only Pythia I see in the mirror.“I’ll hurt her,” I whisper, my heart wrenching. My stomach tightens, and I begin to feel sick. “Tell me there’s a way to prevent that version of our future, Pythia.”“I can’t, Your Excellency. This happens in every version of the future I have been shown.”“There must be something you can tell me, something you can do.”She shakes her head and bows, disappearing before I can question her further. I clench the shard in my hand, coating it in my black poisonous blood.I stare at my hand, realization dawning. It’s only a matter of time before I infect Arabella, too.