Isit up in bed and glance at the clock Elaine gifted me a few days ago, when I complained about the eternal darkness and my inability to keep track of how much time passes the way I would in Althea. It’s early in the morning, and Felix has yet to return to the palace. He left shortly after we discovered I might have air wielding powers, due to yet another avalanche, and I’m growing concerned. When he takes Sirocco, he’s often back by nightfall, but he’s been away for three nights so far.Three nights have never felt so long. I’ve been unwilling to admit it to myself, but I’ve grown accustomed to waking at night to find him holding me tightly, the rising and falling of his strong chest bringing me a sense of comfort I’ve never known before.Every night, I find myself pretending to be asleep when I hear the slightest sound in the corridor, in the hope he’ll walk in and join me in bed. He thinks I’m unaware of his attempts to give me space, and with each night I spend alone in our bed, I wish more fervently that I’d just admitted how safe I feel in his arms. Perhaps then, he wouldn’t have stayed away so long.I bite down on my lip and try to refocus on my book, only for my thoughts to keep returning to Felix. I’ve scoured through his library in search of books about elemental powers, only to find little to nothing. As it turns out, elemental powers of any kind are incredibly rare, and the last known wielder lived over a thousand years ago.I sigh as I lean back against my pillow. Felix must have been wrong. There is no way someone like me possesses such a rare and powerful power, and if I did, surely I’d have known? If I’m that powerful, why did my powers never save me when my father hurt me?I’ve even tried to levitate objects, the way Felix claims I levitated the icicles, but that, too, was to no avail. The more I try it, the sillier I feel. I’m as powerless as I’ve always been, and the hope I’d begun to feel has started to douse.I startle when the bedroom door opens and at last Felix walks in, our eyes locking for a moment. My heart skips a beat at the sight of him, and I sit up instinctively, only barely able to suppress my desire to walk up to him.“You’re still awake,” he says, hanging his head for a moment. His clothes are soiled with filth and blood, and defeat fills the air between us. He takes a deep breath as he walks past the bed toward the bathtub, which has already started to fill itself, and I blush when I hear the sounds of his clothes hitting the floor.“How did it go?” I ask carefully, feeling oddly shy. I feel like I’ve waited an eternity for him to return safely, yet now that he’s here, I’m at a loss for words. Every moment of intimacy we’ve shared has been under the cover of night, little stolen moments I’ve pretended I’m unaware of.I bite down on my lip when I hear him sink into the water. “We lost a lot of people this time, both soldiers and civilians. I’ve never seen anything like it. Elaine was right. It’s like the curse knows I found you, like it knows we’re closer than ever to ridding ourselves of it.”I don’t have the heart to tell him that I think he’s wrong, that I don’t have any powers after all. It’s clear he needs hope and reassuring words, and I want nothing more than to give him that, but I’d be lying if I did. “I’m glad you’re home safe and sound,” I tell him instead, meaning the words. “I was worried about you.”He rises from the water, and my heart begins to beat a little faster as I gently close my book. Felix walks to the bed wearing nothing but a pair of black shorts, and I look down at my hands to keep from staring. I know the feel of his body by heart, and once or twice, I’ve let my hands wander at night. Even so, looking at him outright feels scandalous.The bed dips when he joins me, and I glance over, unable to help myself. “You’re hurt,” I murmur, aghast. I rise to my knees and reach for him without thinking, surprised to see fresh raised scars on his skin that even the moving veins can’t hide. The bleeding has stopped, but it’s clear these wounds aren’t disappearing the way they usually would.I trace over them with the tip of my finger, and Felix grabs my wrist. He presses my palm flat against his chest, and I look into his eyes to find him gazing at me with an expression I’ve never seen before—not even the night I stabbed him and he punished me for it. His eyes are filled with vulnerability and longing.noveldrama“The wounds don’t heal as fast when they’re inflicted by the curse. This time it tried to bury me in an avalanche. The wounds are from sharp ice. Much like the rosebushes we encountered, the ice seemed sentient, too.” A shudder runs down my spine, and I gently trace over the rapidly forming scar tissue with the edge of my thumb. “They’ll be gone by tomorrow morning, but they don’t disappear instantly. I’ve wondered if I’d die if I let it hurt me enough, but it always stops just before I die. It’s clearly aware that it’ll die with me. I wish I could just put an end to this already. I’m tired of watching my people suffer, knowing I’m the one to blame. If I’d just let the woods cage us in like they try to, maybe my people and I would’ve perished together, and that’d have been the end of it.”“There’s no use pondering the what-ifs. If it’s true that I was prophesied, the curse wouldn’t have let you go even if you had taken different steps. We’ll figure this out,” I tell him, repeating the words he told me back to him.“Perhaps so,” he says, reaching for my hair. He gently pushes it behind my ear, his gaze roaming over the lace nightgown the palace provided me with tonight. “I’m just so tired, Arabella. Tired of this endless fight, of the curse’s effects on my body and mind, and the…”“The what?” I urge.My breath hitches when he reaches for the thin strap on my shoulder, his gaze heated. My chest begins to rise and fall more rapidly, and Felix draws a shaky breath. “The unending loneliness,” he whispers, his hand falling away.I reach for his hand and put it back on my shoulder hesitantly. “But you aren’t alone anymore,” I murmur, my heart beating a rhythm I’m unfamiliar with. Something hot and heavy settles deep in my stomach as he looks at me, hope warring with desire in his enchanting eyes.“Just because I’m no longer alone doesn’t mean I’m any less lonely,” he says, his voice breaking. “You’re my wife, but you’ll never be mine. You wouldn’t be here if given a choice.”“I am yours,” I whisper as I use his hand to push the strap off my shoulder. “I promised to help you, so let me. You asked me to give our marriage an honest chance, didn’t you? This is me trying.”His gaze darkens, and he swallows hard as his eyes trail down my body, only to linger on the way the fabric of my nightgown clings to my chest, my strap hanging off my shoulder. “I need you to tell me in clear words what it is you’re trying.”I bite down on my lip harshly, my nerves getting the best of me. “I think we should consummate our marriage.”